the world as I see it

a friend posted this today…i thought it was funny. thanks, Brody!

Oddly enough, I am. I spend most of my afternoon cleaning my apartment and researching life in Nashville, TN. Pretty interesting stuff. I found my estimated salary and bills, and it was somewhat of a shocker. I realized once again that life costs a lot of money. I guess that I understand that to a certain extent considering the fact that I moved out from my parents’ house three years ago…trekking 3500 miles from home has a way of being expensive, lol. However, I haven’t had to pay for my cell phone or my groceries or my loan payments or car insurance yet, so when i factored all that in-WOW!

In other news, this is last week of “freedom”. AKA “Hell Month” starts next week. I will be studying for tests and taking tests and studying for more tests and taking more tests. However, I have decided to keep from complaining about it. That sounds like a tall order-a near impossible order, in fact. But here’s my thinking. I have been given the opportunity of a lifetime. I go to CAROLINA for crying out loud! That’s a big flippin’ deal! And not only do I go here, but Jesus has provided a way for me to pay for my education. And I have made some really cool friends. And not only that, but some of my friends and I have really been interceding for UNC, and we feel like the spirit of God is gonna fall in a major way-which is something I get to be a part of. Not only that, but I am getting the opportunity to do something that only about 10% of people in the world get to do. So rather complain about it, I want to praise God for the favor He’s given me to do this. And to reinforce this, I have decided to fast. I really want the spirit of God to come and meet people all over campus, whether they are saved or not. I want there to be a refreshing on campus. I feel like “hell month” is a really great time for me to get really self-focused and only be concerned with my grades. But I think Jesus wants to refresh me and be bigger than that, and I believe He wants to be that for the rest of campus, too. So what am I fasting? Well, I was considering meat or makeup, but I decided on what seems to be my biggest vice as of late…TV. It keeps me form being disciplined, and it keeps me from interacting with other people, and sometimes even with God. So the cable came out today, and it will stay out until Spring Break-exactly 40 days…dun dun dun!

On top of that, I have decided to pursue greater community on campus. I went to my book group last night, and on the way home, Lerryn and I were talking about how lonely and isolated we feel, and how ridiculous because we are literally in a sea of like 50, 000 people. We feel like our loneliness distracts us and depresses us. We were created to worship, and community is a really big part of that. When I get lonely, what do I do? I turn on the TV. So today has been hard because I’ve been lonely, but there’s been no TV. And it’s not like I don’t pray or spend time with God, because I do. But that doesn’t mean I’m not lonely. And apparently a few of my other friends feel exactly this way, also. So this weekend, we are going to study together. We will feel better, and we will probably perform better academically and ever push each other forward spiritually. We wanna be there for each other, and that’s waht loving Jesus together is all about.

So that’s my life right now I guess. This was an attempt to keep me from my econ. homework and my history novel, but apparently it was a futile attempt. So I am off to crunch numbers and read a novel. Call the cell if you need me. I would LOVE to talk to you, whoever you are

so i have been really sick for the last week.  and when one is sick, there is a lot of extra time.  And what does a sick person do with all that extra time?  watch lots of TV…at least I do.  Usually I can turn off my brain and sleep …but i’ve also had a chance to observe.  And TV is so full of garbage!  I thought that if i stayed on the family channel I would be safe…WRONG!  The shows promote sex out of marriage, cursing, drinking, partying, witchcraft, and the commercials are either for inappropriate or horror films.  And the movies they play are movies I could never watch with my parents…and if i can’t watch it with them, i shouldn’t watch it.  And even straying from the family channel, i saw a commercial for a new show called “Moment of Truth”, where people are hooked up to lie detectors and asked really humiliating questions like “Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?” and “Have you ever touched a co-worker inappropriately?”  Why would you volunteer to answer those questions? Why would anyone want to humiliate people like that?  It just really bugs me.  And what’s worse is that most Christians I know are ok with it…  aren’t we supposed to be “little Christs”?  what about living a life worthy of our calling and passionatley pursuing the heart of Jesus.  I’m not saying I’m immune because I have totally entertained myself with stuff like that..and it’s so NOT ok.   I think I’m starting to see it as slapping Jesus’ holiness and redemption in the face.  It’s disrespectful, and it’s harmful to me…

It all makes me think of Heath Ledger.  It’s weird to think that a few hours ago he was alive and kickin’…now he’s burning in hell.  I walk around on a campus full of Heath Ledgers…people whp are searching for significance and fulfillment.  They are curious and they are hungry.  But they are also deceived…and unless I live the life I have been called to, they will never know I have the answer.  However, yesterday, I was reading Matthew 23, and Jesus totally slams religious people.  He talks about how blind they are and calls them hypocrites.  It’s all because they didn’t love.  I can’t say I always love people on my campus.  And I am definitely a hypocrite.  I am human.  I want desperately for Jesus to use me on my campus.  I want Him to show up in ridiculous ways…so I think I am realizing once again that I am imperfect…and I can’t always see the line that separates set apart from religious.  But I do live in the grace of God, and I know he makes up the difference…just a few of my thoughts…more thoughts to come later…

well, a new semester has begun.  I officially only have three more semesters (including this one) until I graduate.  I am finally started major classes, and right now it looks like everything I am taking is going to be interesting.  I wrote my very first news report today…it made me feel very official, lol.  Anyways, I did something quite funny.  I mapped out in my planner when I have all of my classes, because including recitation I have 9.  And if you are really amazing, you can do that without a planner…but I am not that person.  So I have everything written in my planner.  As it turns out, there is WAY too much information in that thing.  Today, I have a Philosophy class from 2-3:15.  All I saw in my planner was the 3:15, so I went home, made lunch, and watched Without A Trace.  Then, at about 2:20, I left my apartment to walk down to the bus stop.  Halfway there, I realized that my class started at 2 and by the time I got there the class would have been over.  Silly me.  Oh well.  There’s always Tuesday to try again   In the meantime, I have some reading to do and some books to buy.